Rules of the road...

Redneck Computer Lingo...

Serial port -A red wine you drink with breakfast.

Hard drive -Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

bug -The reason you give for calling in sick.

Keyboard -Place to hang your truck keys.

diskette -Female disco dancer.

Floppy -When you run out of Polygrip.

SCSI -What you call your week-old underwear.

Modem -How you got rid of your dandelions.

ROM -1 Delicious when you mix it with Coca-Cola -2 Where the pope lives.

Byte -First word in a kiss-off phrase.

Reboot -What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.

Mouse -Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in order to get a free case.

Mouse pad -Where Mickey and Minnie live.

LAN -To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."

online -Where to stay when taking the sobriety test.

Cursor -What some guys do when they are mad at their wife and/or girlfriend.

cache -Needed when you run out of food stamps.

bit -A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the porch longways."

digital control -What yore fingers do on the TV remote.

packet -What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.

megahertz -How your head feels after 17 beers.

backup -What you do when you run across a skunk in the woods.

bar code -Them's the fight'n rules down at the local tavern.

Superconductor -Amtrak's employee of the year.

Shameless Promotion of product...

How many beers did it take...before the marketing guys came up with that idea?

...Brilliant!!!